wow....

The past two days have been insane.  Well actually the last 3 days.  Friday night my dear friend Kelly who traveled with me went home as scheduled.  It was very sad to see her leave but I was so grateful that I got to spend an amazing 4 days with her.  She is a part of my life story now.  Anytime I tell the story of my son I will say how she was at my side the entire time.  How lucky am I to have such an amazing person in my life? 

Saturday was like no other day I have ever experienced or imagined in my life.  I woke up at 6am and went down for breakfast.  The director and his wife joined me. After breakfast the director stated that he would let his wife be in charge of me.  I went with her and her humanitarian group of Americans.  We got on their bug and traveled to the largest market in the world.  The only words I have are..... scary, mad house, rudeness, cheap, dirty, and amazing.  I got really good deals on scarfs and toys for my boys but it was scary.  I was literally being pulled in different directions by Ethiopian people trying to get me to buy their products.  The individuals I was with that day are part of an organization called Hope Arising.  they are doing amazing work in Ethiopia and I feel honored that I got to spend the day in their presence.  We all went to dinner together and then dropped them off at the airport.  I went back to the guest house tired, alone, and missing my sweet Kadin. 

Today (Sunday) I woke up to a cold shower and a lonely spirit.  I went to breakfast and the director greeted me with a smile and said "You miss English".  I wanted to say no but I couldn't.  I fought back the tears and said I just missed my family.    He told me today would be a good day.  Right after breakfast I went and got Lennox from his room.  We went back to the guest house and he fell asleep on my chest.  The director was right... Today was a good day.  I held Lennox for 3 hours while he slept.  I forgot for those 3 hours that I was away from my family, friends, and sweet boy Kadin.  I was holding, loving, ,and comforting MY SON.  Later that day the director picked me up for a traditional Ethiopian dinner.  I told him that I wanted to say good night to Lennox first.  I walked into the back courtyard and found out that they moved Lennox's bed to a new room.  The sign above his new room says "Toddler boys".  I absolutely lost it.... My sweet baby boy was not ready to be int he toddler room.  He can't even sit up fully on his won and now he is being moved.  I asked the director why he as moved and he took me to Lennox's old room.  In his old bed was a 3 month old little girl who was 3 pounds. Her little legs where barely bigger than my fingers. She laid there as if she was dead.  I saw her tiny chest moving and I reached out and held her hand.  She opened her eyes and looked at me. She was so helpless an sick it broke my heart.  All I know is that the police found her in the street and brought her to the transition home. They named her Helen.  I immediately went back to see my healthy baby boys face and I stopped at the window.  I looked in the window and Lennox saw me.  He pulled himself up and smiled at me. It was the first time e was excited to see me, he knew that I was someone who will make him happy, comfort and protect him.  It is a moment that I will remember and cherish forever.  I just pray that Helen can find a family that will love and cherish every moment with her. 

On the upside we finally made it to dinner and it was great. The food was kinda nasty but the experience was awesome. There was traditional Ethiopian dancing, coffee, popcorn, and beer.  I can't wait to show the video to family, friends, and eventually Lennox.  What an amazing 3 days.!!!

Wish me luck with court tomorrow

more later
Jessica